


Warmth

by Akiko_Natsuko



Series: Gratsu [7]
Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Apologies, Character Death, Death, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fire, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, Heavy Angst, M/M, Sacrifice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-04
Updated: 2018-11-04
Packaged: 2019-08-17 07:36:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16512008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akiko_Natsuko/pseuds/Akiko_Natsuko
Summary: It had been Natsu's warmth that Gray had fallen in love with, but he had never imagined that it would be a different type of flame that would tear them apart.





	Warmth

    Gray’s entire world had narrowed down to the unbearable heat that was currently pressing down on him, and the hungry flames that were gradually creeping closer and closer to his skin as his ice began to give way, losing ground with each desperate breath he took. Tears, of both pain and fear streaked down his cheeks as he struggled to lift his head, forcing himself to look at the source of the flames, feeling his heart break anew as his searching gaze was met by hostile, amber eyes. Eyes that only moments before had been the warm olive that he had come to love so much, olive that had been flooded with love and terror as Natsu had pleaded with him to kill him, to end him before he became a monster. Desperately begging Gray to kill the one person the Ice mage was sure that he could never kill, that he’d never thought he’d need to kill and he’d faltered, his refusal on the tip of his tongue, only for the words to fizzle out completely when the Dragon-slayer had screamed.

It was a sound that would haunt him forever, if he lived…

   He’d been forced to watch, helpless to intervene as his mate twisted and writhed in agony as flames, dark, angry flames unlike the ones that Gray had learned to trust with every fibre of his being, engulfed him. Yet, it had only been when he had caught sight of the deep vermillion scales that were slowly creeping across Natsu’s skin in the wake of the flames, that it finally dawned on him just what Natsu had been trying to tell him. And why the idiot had looked so certain that Gray would agree to his desperate please.

E.N.D.

    Despite their best efforts they had only been able to find vague references to the being that was known as Zeref’s strongest demon, but they had learned enough for Gray to recognise what was happening to Natsu, what his mate was becoming. Desperately he’d tried to tell himself that he wasn’t possible, that Natsu couldn’t be the demon that he had promised to destroy, but he had seen the truth in the guilt and self-hatred in the olive eyes before it had been wiped away by rage and a ravenous hunger that could never have belonged to his Natsu. He’d wanted to say something, to reassure him that it didn’t change anything, but he didn’t have time to get the words out before the olive had disappeared giving way to the wild, burning amber, he was now facing.

    The promise he’d made to his father had echoed in his ears, whilst Natsu’s determination to defeat Zeref and his loyal presence at Gray’s side as he sought E.N.D replayed through his mind, tears dripping down his cheeks as Natsu…no…E.N. D growled at him, the flames that had been devouring him sinking back as he gained control over them, and the Ice mage found himself backing away. _I can’t kill him._  He had realised that in the same moment that he had accepted the truth of what his eyes were telling him. The calmer, more rational part of his mind was trying to tell him that it might be the only choice he had, that it might even be a mercy to kill Natsu, if his lovable idiot of a mate was truly lost to him. It didn’t matter, he couldn’t do it. He wouldn’t. Silently he apologised to Silver, struggling not to glance down at his arm as he felt his Ice Devil powers stirring in response to the proximity of a demon as he took a cautious step forward, only to freeze as those unhuman eyes had focused on him.

“Natsu…please,” his voice trembled as he’d forced himself to hold the demon’s gaze, cracking over the plea as he searched desperately for some hint of the man he loved. There was nothing. Nothing to show that Natsu was hearing his voice, that he was even aware that Gray was there and ready to fight for him and his voice had caught in his throat. _Natsu, is this really how it’s going to end?_ Shaking his head, remembering the whispered promises and plans they’d made before, both desperate to have something to cling to, something to get through this battle, and his expression hardened, refusing to let that future slip away ow that they had come so close to victory. “Please come back to me!”

    For the briefest moment he’d thought that there had been a flicker in the hostile gaze, and he’d risked another step forward. He was determined to bring back his Natsu, certain that all they needed was a chance for the Dragon-slayer to regain control, and then they could go back to the guild and find some way of either driving E.N.D. out completely or sealing it away again. In that moment he honestly didn’t care which, just as long as Natsu survived, as long as he could see the olive eyes he loved so much and curl up in the welcoming heat that once upon a time he had been foolish enough to think he hated. However, he had realised too late that the flicker hadn’t been enough, and he’d barely had enough time to form an icy shield as E.N.D had charged at him with a pained howl, and then his world had been nothing but heat and flame, and those dreadful, inhuman eyes.

     The flames were spreading again now, curling around his weakening ice and reaching hungrily towards his trembling arms and he closed his eyes. He knew that he could’ve fought back, that he could use the magic his father had left him for just this foe, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. Not when it was Natsu who was trapped within the demon, not when it was the man that at some point had managed to slip through all his defences and become far too important to him. Instead he squeezed his eyes shut, frantically trying to shore up what defences he would allow himself, whilst allowing himself to imagine that it was a kinder, gentler heat wrapping itself around him, and it was the flames that he had come to love curling against his skin.

     _It had been Natsu’s warmth, not just his magic, but his personality and that stupid, loveable grin that could light up the guild and give them hope no matter how dire the situation was that had drawn Gray in. It had been like a siren song to someone who had never really known that kind of warmth. He was a child of ice and mountains, and every time he’d had warmth of his own… his family and their small, but homely house…the life he had made with Ur and Lyon in that isolated cottage…it had been stolen from him. When he had come to Fairy Tail he had sworn to himself that he was never going to put faith in that kind of warmth again, that he wasn’t going to let people get that close to him ever again._

_It was a decision that had been challenged from the start, with Erza being the first to push through his barriers, and it hadn’t taken him long to realise that it wasn’t going to be possible to keep out the guild’s warmth completely. However, he hadn’t been able to abandon his icy barriers completely. He hadn’t dared._

_Then Natsu had arrived, wild and unpredictable, all bright smiles and loud voice and Gray had hated him at first sight. Hated the way that Natsu could be so happy even after everything he had had apparently been through, hated the fact that the pink-haired boy had burst into his life and acted as though his barriers didn’t even exist. At that point he had feared the other boy’s warmth, feared that it would tear down his barriers and leave him open to pain and he had pushed back, challenging Natsu at every turn and trying to do everything in his power to drive the smaller boy away. It hadn’t worked. If anything, his efforts had only seemed to make the Fire mage even more determined to break through his barriers._

_He had managed to hold Natsu at bay well until into their teens, struggling to ignore the fact that he could feel his barriers weakening under the constant barrier, and that he could feel himself beginning t see Natsu as something more than a rival. More than a friend. His denial had held up for a long time though, even after Erza had forced them to form a team together, surviving through those first few jobs they’d done together._

_Then Galuna Island had happened._

_His walls had already been weakened by having his past raked up for all to see, but they had finally shattered when Natsu…when the stupid, idiotic, reckless… self-sacrificing idiot had stepped in between him and Deliora and taken the blow that had been meant for him. In that moment he had honestly thought that he was about to watch Natsu die, that the Dragon-slayer was going to disappear because of him, but he hadn’t. Natsu had survived, and in the aftermath his warmth had steadily seeped in through the cracks that his reckless actions had caused._

_It had still taken time. Even with his barriers weakened and having faced some of his past and come out stronger for it, Gray was still wary of lowering them completely, but he found himself trying, reaching out more and more towards that tempting warmth. He had found himself doing things to try and earn that bright smile, to try and coax Natsu’s warmth to even greater levels._

_There had never really been a definitive moment when his barriers had fallen, or even where they had acknowledged that their friendship had become something completely different. It had just happened. Teasing remarks about not losing had become quiet demands to come back, uninjured if possible, but to come back no matter wat. Claps on the back had become warm hugs and eventually shy kisses, and at some point Natsu’s warmth had become his everything._

    Gray blinked, his vision blurring with tears as he refocused on E.N.D as the flames around him intensified. In the past he would’ve blamed himself for trusting that warmth, believing that this unbearably hot fire that was threatening to consume them both was because he had lowered his barriers. But he had changed, he had grown because of the guild, because of Natsu and so he shoved those thoughts away, ice crackling around him as instead of admitting defeat he moved forward, physically pushing himself closer and closer to the hungry flames.

“I won’t let you take him,” he snarled at the demon, not flinching from the inhuman gaze and that was why he caught the flicker of surprise in the amber eyes at both his words and actions. He felt a smile crossing his lips as he stared into the depths of the demon’s eyes, imaging that he was looking into Natsu’s and that he could see his mate looking back at him. “I don’t care how hot your flames are or how powerful you are. It is nothing compared to his warmth.” _Nothing,_ he repeated silently as he gathered every shred of his courage, letting the shield fall away as he flung himself forward, wrapping his arms around the demon even as the flames immediately leapt higher and he felt rather than heard the scream that was torn from his throat.

    _It hurts. It hurts. IT HURTS._ Everything was screaming at him to let go of E.N.D, to escape the flames and the pain before it was too late, but instead he bit down on his lip and pulled the Demon closer. _It hurts._ He couldn’t see through the tears and shadows that were now blurring his vision, but he didn’t need to, leaning forward until he could feel the Demon’s ear beneath his searching nose.

“Natsu…” His voice cracked, and his knees threatened to buckle. _It hurts._ Darkness was encroaching on his thoughts as well now; his strength waning and it was only he the memory of the warmth that he loved so much that gave him the strength to cling onto E.N.D. His arms tightening desperately around him as he fought to get out the rest of the words he wanted, needed to say. “I…love you.” His eyes slipped shut a moment as he lost his fight against the flames, darkness claiming him, and he was unaware of the way scaled arms tightened around him as he went limp. Unaware of the humanity that seeped back into amber eyes, tinging them olive once more as a pained howl slipped free.

    The sound echoed, filling the air, before fading away as Natsu’s fleeting moment of awareness seeped away as well. This time surrendered willingly after he’d realised that Gray was gone, the Ice mage’s life stolen away by his flames, and holding his mate close he willingly succumbed to the flames with a final whisper.

“Gray…”

_I love you too. I’m sorry._

 


End file.
